If you want success, then do not compare yourself to the person sitting next to you. You are not competing against anyone in this life but you. Focus on your own path and stay in tune with your goals. Remember: No one even achieved anything when they stopped trying, and no one is ever born an expert. Read success stories for motivation and know that if that one person achieved their goal, then you can too!
How to respond to a jealous or negative comment?
1. Do NOT take things personally! Usually when someone is actively negative, it has absolutely everything to do with them and nothing to do with you. You might actually notice that the person in question makes comments about everyone in a bad way, so no matter what you do or don’t do, you will be a topic of conversation for them.
2. Remember: What other people think about you is none of your business! You rocked this world with your successes and you should own that success. Be proud of yourself and stand tall! No one knows how hard you worked and no one has the right to judge you.
3. You cannot and never will please everyone. It’s just not possible, so let go of having to make everyone happy! Do your best to be compassionate, loving, genuine and honest but know that sometimes people will still not like you, even if you are a good person, and that’s okay! People even find reasons to not like the Dalai Lama, so come on!
4. Choose not to comment. Take the higher ground with negativity and simply do not acknowledge it. Look at it as a spiritual challenge and an opportunity to grow emotionally. Letting go of the need to reply is truly a remarkable release and you will find so much freedom there! Plus, it stops the energy of negativity dead in its tracks. Remember, you cannot have an argument with only one person. Think of yourself as bamboo, strong in your form but flexible to move in the wind. You can withstand any storm as long as you stay focused in your strength!
5. Be kind but practice safe distancing. If you see a pattern in one person who is continuously jabbing you with snide comments, then you should think about whether or not you want to have that person in your life. You are precious and your time is precious, so choose who you give your time to wisely. I often think the best thing to do is to be as compassionate and kind as you can but slowly distance yourself from the person, making it clear that you are not available. They will either change their tune and start getting more positive on their own, or they will set their sights to something or someone else.
6-When in doubt, send them love!
If you are absolutely unsure what to do with the negative Nelly in your life, then simply send them love! Especially if you catch yourself caught in the midst of “What?” “Why?” “How could they?” “Don’t they know that….” then it’s time to stop, close your eyes, and take a long deep breath. Visualize a huge white ray of love and light wrapping itself around Nelly filling him or her with Divine unconditional love. Watch and wait what happens. You will be amazed to see the change. Sometimes it’s even instant!
7-What if you feel envious of someone else?
Don’t beat yourself for being human if you have the occasional feeling of envy. It’s normal to feel a slight pang of envy when you see someone enjoying success. But, if you feel yourself being spiteful or speaking untruths about someone just to better your own position, then you need to get yourself in check. You will never reach your full healing potential if you stay stuck in the gutter of negativity, and the only person who continues to suffer is you! Jealousy is a monster of a negative emotion. It can literally make your liver run hot, stress your adrenal glands, deplete your body of minerals and make you more acidic just from the buildup of negative emotions. On the flip side, feeling mof compassion, love, acceptance, happiness and joy are all extremely alkalizing for the body and good for your health.
How To Deal With Jealousy
Treat Jealousy as a Compliment for Yourself
When jealous people treat us unfairly (such as ignore us, insult us), it often brings our confidence down and such. We spent a long time wondering why they’re doing that to us, and maybe that is their purpose, they want to make you feel bad about yourself as they do. Well, don’t fall for it! I believe that if you understand that they’re actually jealous, it’s MUCH EASIER to accept the things they are doing, you can almost look at it with a positive light, such as there’s obviously something good you’re doing or you’re brilliant at something that other people want so desperately, to the point they would act in such manner.
So, if you have people who are jealous of you, be proud of that, let that be a compliment!
Do they actually know you?
I guarantee that most often, people who are jealous of you don’t know you all that well. People have this tendency to also fear the unknown, added to the fact that you’re brilliant or got something they want, it’s going to turn them off more.
The easiest way to handle that is to see if there’s a chance for you to actually get to know that person more. Perhaps when they “know” you, they will see you in a different perspective, rather than a threat to them!
Confront Them Face to Face or Stay Away
I know this is possibly the hardest thing you can ever do, but firstly, you have to look at your own situation. Every person’s situation is unique and I can only speak from experience, that sometimes when people are jealous, they’re not even really aiming it at the person, but the situation. Everyone handles jealousy differently. If you have a case of someone being seriously insulting or horrible towards you, then I recommend just blocking them from your life forever (if it’s on the internet). In real life, perhaps you will need to just stay away from this person.
If they seem semi reasonable and you feel that perhaps you can get through, maybe you will need to confront them and tell them what they are doing. When things are in the open, they are much easier to solve!
Solving the Situation
Could the situation be better? I think one of the jealousies that come up a lot in school is when there’s two friends, and then one more comes along and one of them is always jealous. In a way, I feel that the problem there is because the person in the middle who obviously knows both his/her friends but they don’t know each other doesn’t really know how to handle treating their two friends equally. See, we don’t like feeling as if we’re left out or that we’re about to lose something. If we can take away that feeling, that would probably remove the jealousies that came with it too!
However, that’s just one of them. If you’re successful at something and some people just happen to stare at you with green, envy eyes and they want the same without doing the work, that’s completely out of your control and you should not have to solve their situation!
So once again, you really have to look at your own situation.
Handling Jealous Girlfriend or Boyfriends
Is someone jealous of you because you’re hanging out with THEIR husband/boyfriend or wife/girlfriend when you have nothing but an innocent friendship? I often don’t find that as big of a problem because they aren’t really showing their jealousy in your face, but I feel that’s something the other person needs to work out as a couple and find out the reason why there are insecurities.
If your partner (romantic) is jealous of you for hanging out with other people, you need to first see how they are handling it. Are they forbidden you to do things you like, or are just worried? If they sound worried, you can always talk and assure them, but if they’re doing something that takes away your freedom, then there’s a big problem and I feel that from experience, these people turn out to have the tendency to abuse others and you should be very careful whether you want them in your life!
Continue to live your life confidently. Realize that there may be people in your life who have conflicts with you that are out of your control. Understand that you are not the only person they have most likely felt this way about, and know that it is not about you. It is truly about them.
For example, if your friend gets upset when you hang out with another friend, continue to live your life in a way that is good for you, and go to see your friend. The jealous person will not be helped if you start adapting your behaviors to their jealousy.
Stop talking about the situation with the jealous person. Talking about the situation a lot may make the situation even more of an issue for you. You don’t need to analyze the situation, because you already understand what is going on.
Kill the haters with kindness.
They really want you to fight back, so don’t. Be nice to them. For example, say “Good morning”, “Hello!” or “Have a good day.”
Acknowledge their presence but not their vitriol. If it becomes clear that they seek to dress you down in public, don’t even acknowledge their presence.
Do not be drawn into a tit for tat fight or argument. They’ve got mounting reasons to project their demons onto you, and you’ll only feed the anger, hate and jealousy if you start calling names, insulting or even trying to explain yourself.
How to prevent jealousy before it happens
Sometimes you might be able to prevent jealousy from happening before it even happens!!
People who will envy you the most are the ones who are in need the most of what you posses. For example, your millionaire friend will never envy you if you bought a new average priced car but your friend who has no car is the one who will most likely be jealous of you.
In the Solid Self confidence program o said that not all the people in need will become jealous or envious but only those who have personal weakness, self doubts and low self esteem will be jealous of you. in order to prevent jealousy from happening make sure you don’t show off a certain thing that you have in front of someone who really needs it.
Finally if someone is jealous of you then know that he is really suffering because of your achievements and that even if you left him without doing anything he would still pay for it by experiencing such emotions.
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